How Bad Would You Want Your Prom To Be Catered By Prisoners?

Apparently, a principal in Colorado thinks it's a good idea to have prisoners cater their High School prom. Uh.. hi? Does he know how to spell "rape" and "molestation"? I literally wouldn't even go to this prom. And if I did, I would come with a brown paper bag filled with my Mom's Leftovers (see what I did there?!). No way anyone is getting within 13 feet of the food, unless the dance floor overflows and people have no choice but to bump and grind right in front of the salad bar.

How many liters of semen will be in the food too? Like over 40, right? Stories like these make me glad I'm not a hot girl. The last thing I would want if I were a hot chick was to have a handful of prisoners watching my every move at prom. Just staring me down in my $400 dress like a hawk eyeing a mouse. Like you know they're gonna get off to this shit too. It'll be like Christmas for these guys. Except the Christmas tree are high school girls, and they don't get to unwrap the presents.