Embarrassing

I honestly don't think that there has ever been a single adjective to describe anything better than how Vancouver is making themselves look during the Finals. Embarrassing.

I mean any team that's the #1 seed is obviously impressive on paper, but these last 3 games have shown me how childish, and just flat out disgusting the entire city of Vancouver is. I hate Burrows for biting Bergy just as much as the next guy, but to be honest I think it was more funny than anything. Like what is this, 3rd grade? It's hilarious how classless the Canucks are.

Vancouver just solidified how pitiful of a city they are with that blindside hit on Horton early on in the first. It was disgusting, and after hearing that Horton will be out for the series, I'm ripshit. Mostly because I know the NHL wont do a single thing to punish Rome. The NHL even helped the guy out by kicking him out of the game with a misconduct call. Dude would have gotten absolutely demolished if he was allowed to keep playing, no doubt about it.

The biggest question I have is how this Horton injury will affect the Bruins throughout the end of this thing. Last night, we all saw a huge emotional lift from the Men In Black (and Gold) after watching Horton get carried off on a stretcher. Recchi was even quoted after the game to say that they were all playing for their fallen teammate. I'm interested to see if this kind of emotion will carry into next week as a winner is crowned. I think it could, but that being said, I'm not sure you can ride the emotional wave all the way to the Cup. I hope I'm wrong, but we'll see.

Coolest Thing Ever?

All health and safety hazards pushed aside here, I don't think I've ever seen anything that looks more fun than this thing. From 2nd-5th grade my playground was a complete joke. Like our school was brand new and shit but everyone knows that the only way to rate an elementary school is by the playground. And even though my town had like 5 elementary schools, mine always ranked dead last. The coolest thing we had was a fucking balancing beam that was shaped like a snake and wobbled a ridiculous amount. That would be cool if we could have at least played chicken on it like regular kids but nope- the recess Nazis wouldn't allow it. To this day, I'm still convinced that they worship the devil.

All I'm saying is that yeah, this thing may be the most unsafe thing in the world, but it's still fucking cool as hell and no one can argue against that. Throw a cat in that thing and enjoy pure elation for the .6 seconds it takes to fly off into the slide. Would I let my kid go play with it? Hell no. Would I want the tax payers money in my town to go straight to buying one of these? Yes. 100%.

Mooooommmbahhhtonn

So, I recently fell in love with Moombahton. It's a genre of electronic dance music, but it's at speeds much slower than normal club songs. The first Moombahton songs were slowed down Afrojack songs and other dutch house music. On top of that they threw on a latin beat. oh my the swing.
I know it's not for everyone, but Moombahton will be big in the next few years, it's on the up and up.

I included my 30 minute moombahton mix, listen if ya like.

To hear the full force of the moombah, skip to 22 minutes in.

Download.

Moombaamix by BeatGen

Twitta: @benny_sonic

contact me if you want song titles

Most Inspirational Speech In The History Of The World

Can't believe I can type through these waves of tears pouring all over my face right now. Where the hell was this kid when I was 6? Coulda used this little pep talk back in the day. To say I drove around with training wheels for a long time would be a ridiculous understatement. The first time I drove anything without training wheels was literally when I got my dumb permit, and I doubt that that even counts because last time I checked, cars had 4 wheels. Good.

I'm No Scientist, But I'm Pretty Sure That Getting An Air Pump Shoved Up Your Ass Wouldn't Actually Make You Inflate Up Like A Giant Balloon..

Title says it all. Don't know the first thing about science except for everything that The Magic School Bus taught me when I'd watch it before I went off to school in the morning. Only thing I learned from that too was that apparently eating cheese doodles will turn your skin orange. Remember that? The little ginger kid who fucking hated going on all those awesome field trips ate nothing but cheese curls for like 14 years and he was straight up orange. I loved cheese curls so much that when I watched that one morning, I immediately shat myself. Top 5 scariest moment of my entire life. I thought I was gonna just slowly turn into an orange mush and die immediately.  I grabbed like 6 crayons and went to town on my bedroom wall, writing out how I wanted to be buried with my stupid orange body. Had some great shit on that list too if I remember correctly. Too bad when I got home my parents made me scrub it all off then grounded the shit out of me. Really made me feel better about my impending death..